Pissed Off

05/30/2009 at 5:27 PM | In Complain | 1 Comment
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I live with a an old man, that won’t allow me to do what I need to do to get my life organized and on track. Today I went out with a friend to lunch, and when she left, he came home and started shit with me. Asking me questions that were totally absurd and rude.

I was also told by one of my other friends tonight that he would help me with my resume, so on my way out I ran into the person I am staying with coming in. I told him I would be back later, that I was going to work on my resume at a friend’s house, and he said, well I was going to make dinner.

I was like okay, I will stay here and not go. He was like do whatever you want, you do so anyway. I am at the point, that I don’t know how to act around him, everything I do, he criticizes, and makes me feel like shit.

Another thing that pissed me off, this morning he came into the bathroom when I was showering and opened the shower curtain and asked me if I was able to find the towels okay? Why the hell would a person do some shit like that? And just a little while ago, he asked me if I jerked off this morning, I have no fucking clue what that has to do with anything.

So I am at the frame of mind, do I stay or do I go back to the street? He is really pissing me off and I don’t know that I can deal with this any longer.

Oh well, it’s not like anyone out there cares about my life, I am just one of millions that has multiple problems. Sorry I am wasting time writing this.

Leg Cramps

05/29/2009 at 5:49 AM | In Medical | 1 Comment
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The last few nights I have been waking up in the middle of the night with leg cramps. It use to be when I would get up and walk around they would go away and I would be able to sleep again, but not the last few nights, these cramps are just above my feet in the front of my leg.

It feels like the muscles are stiffening up. Usually it takes about 10 minutes or so and the cramps are gone, but today they lasted almost an hour. I have tried rubbing my legs, taking a shower, I am taking vitamins to see if that helps to eliminate the cramps, but so far nothing is working.

I don’t know what I am going to do, I can’t keep waking up like this in the middle of the night and expect to function on a daily basis.

What would you do?

05/28/2009 at 8:50 AM | In Daily | 2 Comments
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What would you do, if you were invited into a place to stay, after being homeless for five years, and you find out that the person that invited you in is gay? I have no issues with homosexuality, but I do when a person tries to push their sexual advances on you.

A little over a week ago, I was given a place to stay by a 78 year old man, who at the time I thought was just doing it to be a nice person, but since I have been here he has made a few sexual advances toward me. The other day he done this and I about punched him in the mouth.

I am not saying that I hate the guy, but I am in a situation where being here is helping me tremendously, two days ago I applied for school again, and I have been focusing heavily on finding work. All the while I sit and wonder what he will do next?

And then this morning I found out what his next move was, he came out of his little sleeping area without clothing, that was enough to make me want to puke. He told me that he likes to sleep nude sometimes and that he like to walk around the house without clothing on. Ok, I can handle or deal with a lot of things, but that was just too much.

I am in a real jam here, I don’t have the patience to keep dealing with this shit, but if I don’t I know the alternative, back under the tree.

So I ask, what would you do in my situation?

College?

05/27/2009 at 10:09 AM | In Daily, Uncategorized | 2 Comments
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I applied to college yesterday morning, it is a local school here, Broward College. I chose Computer Science and Information. It will be exciting to see how things turn out.

I also applied for financial aid, so if all goes well, maybe this fall I will be in school. I certainly hope so, it would make me feel alot more productive.

Wish me luck.

Inside, Again.

05/20/2009 at 10:03 AM | In Daily | 1 Comment
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I am back indoors again, I was offered a place to stay a few days ago, and I have been staying there every since. And like last time I was indoors I am finding it hard to adjust to being in a house.

I am not complaining for sure, but when you have been living life on the streets and doing everything as a matter of survival and not enjoyment, it gets hard when that flip flops.

The biggest adjustment for me, has been laying on a soft couch at night and not worrying about the rain that I have been hearing coming down the last few nights. I do think about it alot though, because I have friends that remain on the street, and I know they have been having really long nights the last few nights.

But I am working on getting my ID and a new copy of my social security card now, I also have been filling out applications for work the past two days, it is nice to be able to put an address and phone number on them.

What was I thinking?

05/18/2009 at 9:14 AM | In Party | 1 Comment
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I went to a party last night, with a friend, it was a farewell/graduation party and I had the intention of having a good time. But that all changed shortly after I entered the house, I instantly segregated myself and sat for the better part of the night alone, I always do this at parties or around large, and I have mentioned it in the past.

It bothers me that I am like that around groups, but I don’t really see things changing for me anytime soon when it comes to interacting with large bodies of people. I told a few of the people there last night, I feel like I have really no common thread with most people.

But the assured me if I gave everyone a chance that I would find something to talk about, but me being the way I am, I just clammed up and sat around. It was not exactly the impression I wanted to leave with people, especially when many of them I was meeting for the first time.

Answers, Part 1

05/16/2009 at 10:09 AM | In Interactive | 1 Comment
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Today, I am going to begin answering some of the questions I have received. My stepmom wants to know:

What is the longest you have gone without a meal?
Well, I have gone 4-5 days without eating at some points being on the street. Like today, I haven’t ate since Thursday night. And most likely I will not eat until tomorrow afternoon when I go to lunch with a friend of mine.

Do you constantly have to fear for your safety?
I worry about my safety everyday, especially at night when I am totally vulnerable to whatever or whoever may walk up in the night with bad intentions. Some nights when I am sleeping in unfamiliar places, I wake up every hour to check and see if anyone or anything is in the area.

I have heard some horrible stories of guys having rocks dropped on their head, or getting the shit kicked out of them, just because they were in the wrong place.

Isn’t there some kind of place you can lock your blankets & camp; stuff up?
That is being looked into, there is a facility that was mentioned in an article my friend found, I haven’t yet had the time to check into it, but I will later this week.

Are you going to go back up to work for that place in Michigan?
Nope, right now I haven’t heard anything back on the situation. I would love to go back and work but a lot of things need to happen in order for me to get there.

Mainly, my former boss needs to say that he has work for me, so that the ball can get rolling here to get me on a bus or a plane back.

Well, I hope that this answers some of your questions, Cindy. Thanks for asking. :)

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